A Positive Assessment (but...)

As most of you know, this year I have been working on improving my health - eating better (I wouldn't say 'right' because it's certainly not always right) and being more active. It's been fun to see my pants become too loose (although not fun having to replace them) and I've enjoyed watching my face slowly morph as my cheeks lose some of the fullness they had gained and my chin loses its twin. But this week, it was truth time. All would be laid bare by a biometric screening at work.

Nerdy, I know, but I was completely looking forward to it. I know myself well enough to understand that I thrive on a good hardy 'job well done!' and the screening seemed like a perfect opportunity to get just that. I forced my protesting-right-to-the-scale husband into accepting an appointment as well, (hoping they would tell him something that would make him overcome his fear of all things green) and waited impatiently for the day to arrive when I could go down the list of health factors and see myself prominently in the 'HEALTHY!' category on every last one.

So Wednesday rolls around, I dress myself in my lightest outfit (how annoying is it that the only time someone else will see the number I have to be two pounds heavier than I KNOW I am?) and we went. My weight - healthy (albeit on the high end of the range). BMI - healthy. Body fat percentage - healthy (and four percentage points lower than my scale at home!). Move onto the blood pressure station... healthy. WHOOP! One last cold-handed nurse - a simple finger prick and some basic blood work. I rub my hands together... looking forward to the big red A+! on my paperwork and the pat on the back.

But.

When she handed over my results and asked me if I had any questions, I happily read down the list - healthy, check, healthy, check. Until I got to what they call 'good cholesterol'. Hmm. That's not healthy. That's too low.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

So I ask the nurse what can be done and she tells me that to increase the good cholesterol number you have to eat more fiber-rich foods such as fresh fruits and vegetables and whole grains.

I barely concealed the smirk. More fresh fruits and vegetables? I want to point out - but a year ago, I didn't eat anything fresh except white potatoes! Don't you understand?!? I now keep a fresh salad in my fridge at all times, I eat veggies at every meal, fruit every day for breakfast. But no - you want MORE. Ugh.

It's like a greedy employer. Great job. Now go be awesome at something else.

Sigh. I dutifully came home and made another fresh salad and ate additional fruit with my breakfast the next day. I am determined that by the time I get a fresh screening next year that impertinent little number has jumped (at a minimum) the last four points into the healthy range. I will not be held back I tell you!

As much as I love my new (smaller!) pants, this healthy stuff can be so demanding.